15 Tips for Enneagram 3 Moms

When you see an Enneagram Type 3 Mom in action, you can’t help but be impressed. She’s the one who appears to have it all together. She exudes confidence and seems to juggle the demands of motherhood, career, and personal life effortlessly. She is dressed to the nines, driving the spotless SUV, and possibly leading a corporate merger during a play date. An Enneagram Type 3 is the picture of success. 

There are good reasons why the Enneagram Type 3 is known as the achiever. Their need to accomplish drives them, and they inspire others through their pursuit (and attainment) of audacious dreams.

The Enneagram Type 3 Mom’s need for achievement can be both a blessing and a curse. On one hand, it helps them be highly productive and effective in managing the demands of both motherhood and their career. On the other hand, it can lead to a lack of balance and an inability to prioritize personal relationships and self-care.

What does it look like for an Enneagram Type 3 Mom to thrive? It means balancing their drive for achievement and their need for rest. It looks like learning to prioritize their relationships and self-care, even when it feels like there are millions of other things to do. Finally, it means setting audacious goals for them and their family while recognizing the value of being present in the moment.

Let’s explore the unique challenges and opportunities of being an Enneagram Type 3 Mom. We’ll look at practical tips and strategies for thriving in motherhood and life and celebrate the many strengths and talents that make Enneagram Type 3s such impressive and inspiring individuals.

Celebrating Strengths

Enneagram Type 3s are known for their drive to succeed and natural talent for achieving their goals. They possess a strong sense of purpose and determination that propels them toward success. They will work hard and put in long hours running toward their goals.  When healthy, they can be excellent leaders with a clear vision for their future and that of their family.

As mothers, Enneagram Type 3s can use their multi-tasking skills to manage their household and family effectively. They are often efficient and productive, which can be a valuable asset when balancing the demands of parenting with work and other responsibilities. The Enneagram Type 3 Mom’s multi-tasking superpower allows them to carve out intentional time for their children.

There’s no better way to strengthen their bond with their little one than to spend quality one-on-one time doing activities their child adores. Enneagram Type 3 Moms are not simply concerned with keeping their kids entertained. They strive to understand their likes and dislikes while exploring their personalities. Whether splashing around in the local swimming pool, engaging in a video game battle, baking some delightful treats, or going for a nature walk, Enneagram Type 3 Moms participate with energy and enthusiasm! 

For Enneagram Type 3 Moms, being fully present, genuinely engaged, and truly enjoying the moment with their child can contribute to lasting memories and positively impact their child’s self-esteem. Just imagine the stories they’ll tell their friends about the extraordinary times spent together!

Overcoming Challenges

There is value in embracing the messy, the silly, and even the frustrating – these moments that ultimately shape us and our relationships are what come together to form our lives. For Enneagram Type 3s, their accomplishments can become intertwined with their sense of self-worth. They may struggle to separate themselves from their achievements, leading them to prioritize their work and career over other areas of life, such as personal relationships or hobbies. This desire can result in a lack of balance in their lives, and they may struggle to find fulfillment outside their work.

Enneagram Type 3 Moms can consciously prioritize their relationships and hobbies and make time for self-care to overcome this. Remember, self-care is never selfish. 

Taking time to nurture their interests and relationships can cultivate a more balanced and fulfilling life. Additionally, they can focus on finding a sense of identity outside their achievements and without unhealthy comparisons. 

Don’t Do This: Common Pitfalls for Enneagram Type 3

As parents, it’s only natural to want the best for our kids and to protect them from the world’s many challenges. The Enneagram Type 3 Mom needs to avoid projecting their need for performance and accomplishment onto their children, respecting their child’s need for independence. An Enneagram Type 3 must allow their children to learn and grow from their mistakes.

As tough as it may be, the Enneagram Type 3 needs to learn to take a step back and let their children experience life through trial and error. This, of course, doesn’t mean leaving them out in the cold but instead giving them the space to make decisions for themselves and overcome the obstacles they face. 

By doing so, Enneagram Type 3 Moms help their children develop crucial life skills, such as problem-solving.  This experience ultimately lays the groundwork for self-sufficient, confident adults who can thrive independently.

Do This Instead: Strategies for Thriving as an Enneagram Type 3 Mom

A valuable gift Enneagram Type 3 Moms can provide their children is giving their kids their full attention when they want to talk. Take time to listen and better understand their thoughts and ideas. Then, encourage those thoughts and ideas. 

When Enneagram Type 3 Moms allow plenty of playtime, their kids develop their imagination and creativity. By providing an environment where they have the freedom to explore, Enneagram Type 3 Moms empower their children to think outside the box, solve problems, and gain a better understanding of the world around them. 

Not to mention, playtime promotes social and emotional growth while also teaching valuable cognitive and communication skills. Whether with interactive games, arts and crafts, or acting out stories, they allow little ones’ creativity to flourish as their imagination takes flight, shaping them into well-rounded individuals ready to embrace the challenges of the future.

Image – allow plenty of playtime

Top Tips For Enneagram Type 3 Moms

Here are our top 15 tips to help our Enneagram Type 3 Moms on their journey of thriving as a parent: 

1. Prioritize self-care

The Enneagram Type 3 has a hard time knowing and experiencing their feelings. Their self-care must involve caring for their authentic self. Listen to this podcast episode with Amy Seiffert, an Enneagram Type 3 herself.

2. Set realistic expectations

We all know life is different after children.  Enneagram Type 3s’ pace before kids is likely unsustainable once they arrive. They’ll have to thoughtfully consider what is realistic for their family.

3. Be present

Enneagram Type 3s are experts at mirroring the emotions of those around them while being able to think about other things. Being present will be a challenging but worthwhile goal for an Enneagram Type 3 Mom.

4. Make time for connection

For an Enneagram 3, love is tied to performance. They can believe they’re only as valuable as their latest achievement. It’s essential to build connections with their loved ones based on their inherent value, not their accomplishments.

5. Avoid over-scheduling

Not everyone runs at the speed of an Enneagram Type 3. A jam-packed calendar is rarely sustainable in the long term. Leaving breathing room in the family schedule prevents exhausting their partner and children. 

6. Practice gratitude

Often, an Enneagram Type 3 can be motivated by external validation. Consistently acknowledging what they are grateful for can keep an Enneagram Type 3 grounded.

7. Be flexible

We all know having children requires ongoing flexibility. This can be challenging for someone as driven by efficiency as a Type 3. They can give themselves the grace to be firm in the outcome and flexible in the process.

8. Set boundaries

Unlike some of the other Enneagram types who need to set clear boundaries with others, Type 3s may need to set boundaries with themselves. With a tendency to be a workaholic, they may need to set limits to ensure their relationships don’t suffer for their striving.

9. Delegate tasks

Enneagram Type 3s can find their identity in their performance. This can make the idea of delegating seem foolish. However, allowing someone else to take something off their plate can provide valuable time to invest in their children and family.

10. Take breaks

The inner workhorse of an Enneagram Type 3 is likely to avoid taking breaks. But, breaks allow them to devote time to relationships that can suffer due to an Enneagram Type 3 Mom’s ambition. Listen to this podcast episode – How to Break Busy.

11. Teach the value of hard work

Appearances are a motivator for the Enneagram Type 3. Doing things for their kids can sometimes be more straightforward, with more predictable results.  However, it’s valuable for their children to learn the virtue of hard work, a trait for which Enneagram Type 3s are recognized.

12. Model self-love

Enneagram Type 3s are natural chameleons, being who they think is needed in any given situation. However, being loving to their authentic self sets a valuable example for their children.

13. Let others lead

As The Road Back To You by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile states, “Resist the temptation to lead.” Not all seasons of life lend themselves to leading every project. This is especially true in some stages of motherhood. Participate as a collaborator, not a driving force. 

14. Practice mindfulness

Focusing on mindfulness can be as simple as practicing breathing techniques, journaling, or spending time outside in nature. Type 3s struggle to connect with their feelings. A mindfulness practice that checks in with their emotions can help them connect with their core self.

15. Remember your why

In a culture obsessed with image and achievement, Enneagram Type 3s are admired by all they come in contact with. It can be easy to fall prey to the negative aspects of that adoration. It is vital for an Enneagram Type 3 Mom to discover and stay true to their why. 

Embracing a Healthy Parenting Journey: Takeaways and Insights

The most important thing is to remember that “parenting” doesn’t mean you need to do it alone. Seek the advice of family, friends, and professionals for support.  There are plenty of resources available to help guide you through this incredible journey, including our Mom Superpower quiz. After all, you’re your children’s biggest cheerleader and advocate! With a little effort and dedication, the rewards will be endless – watching them grow into healthy, happy adults is worth it!