The Secret to Taking Action with Debra Fileta Episode 328

The Secret to Taking Action

Today, I’m with one of my favorite smart girls, Debra Fileta. She is an amazing counselor. She is an author many times over. She’s a speaker. She runs a network of Christian counselors. She’s absolutely brilliant, and she is so kind, gracious, and loving. 

Today, you’ll get to know her a little bit more, and you’ll get to know how she got to where she is. I’m thrilled to share the behind-the-scenes of Debra’s journey, the things that nobody ever gets to talk about. It’s a privilege to delve into this, and I’m sure you’ll find it fascinating. 

Debra Fileta is a Licensed Professional Counselor specializing in dating, marriage, and relationship issues, along with a spectrum of mental health disorders and issues. She is also a speaker, and host of the Love + Relationships podcast. The author of six books, including her latest, RESET: Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life. 

Let’s get into the secret of taking action with Debra!

How the Fear of the Word “Striving” Leads Us to Not Taking Action

I asked Debra about the word that many Christian women fear, “striving,” and if she knew where this fear generated from because every time I get asked, “How do I know I’m not striving or how do you know that you’re working toward a goal without striving,” I’m always tempted to go on a rant, and that’s not helpful. 

Debra thinks the underlying idea is maybe believing that you don’t trust God and that you’re trying to do more than He’s called you to do. It’s kind of like taking matters into your own hands like I’m going to make this happen, instead of trusting God to make it happen. God calls us to be intentional in so many ways with what we have, what we’ve been given, with where we’re going. 

Scheduling Your Day to Help You Start Taking Action

Debra says she’s not an early bird, so homeschooling works for her and her family because it’s a slow-paced morning. And she’s the type of person to schedule and plan her days up to a few months out. So right now, she has two days where she works on counseling her clients, then sets time to answer emails, time for writing, and podcasting. If she’s in a writing season, then she isn’t doing podcast interviews, and when she’s not writing, she has more time for podcasting and media things. 

In order to move the needle forward, it’s important to make a schedule and plan the tasks you need to complete. This will help you take action in your business, ministry, writing, etc. 

Healthy Parameters with Social Media

Debra has a social media manager for all platforms except Instagram, so she posts, answers DMs, and goes live herself. But she sets a forty-five-minute limit on Instagram. Within those forty-five minutes, she is making sure she’s doing about 85% output and only 15% input. This includes answering DMs, and she views this task as part of her business, not for leisure. 

Setting boundaries like time limits on social media apps is beneficial for our mental health. We need to be careful about what we consume on social media and how much time we spend on it, as it can easily become draining. 

Research says the more time you spend on social media where it’s passive, where you aren’t actively engaging, we’re commenting and sending messages, the more passive time you spend scrolling, the worse you’re going to feel after it. So, I think that tip Debra shares 15 % input, and then the rest of the output is really smart.

How great was Debra, right? All of this is great advice to help you start taking action.

Listen or Watch now:

iTunes.

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Favorite Quotes: 

“It’s this idea of do you wait on God or do you take action as if they’re two different things. But to me, waiting on God is a posture of my heart. It’s not a passive posture, not sitting around twiddling my thumbs. It’s being intentional and moving towards Him.”

3:33

“I am responsible for doing all that I can do with the talents that God has given me, and then He’s responsible for doing all that He can do. And when we both do that, really good things can happen.”

4:14

“Living intentionally is living how God wants us to live.”

8:17

“It takes that faithfulness to what’s in front of you and then always going back to why am I doing this to begin with? Why am I actually doing this? I’m doing this because this is what God has called me to do. I’m doing this because I have a message that He’s placed on my heart. And if I really believe that, then I need to be a good steward of sharing that message.”

15:35

“Sometimes, the most thriving ministries are the ones that are the best in their business mentality because it’s about growth. It’s about being good stewards of what you have been given, not just winging it.”

27:42

“I also feel like the more the Lord gives me, the more intentional I need to be with keeping my heart in the right place and just holding onto that attitude that this is really for Him.”

31:55

Links to Great Things We Discussed:

• Debra Fileta Website
• Debra Fileta Instagram
• Soul Care: *Find Life-Giving Rhythms *Live Restored *Avoid Burnout *Discover Unspeakable Joy
• Bye Bye Foundation
• Real Techniques Sponge
• The Fall Guy
• Inside Out 2
• Hit Man
• Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga
• Secret Superpower Quiz
• Create a Course
• Alli on YouTube
• Remaining You While Raising Them
• Little Things Studio

Little Things Studio is a woman-owned small business bringing daily reminders of beauty and truth to your home and life. These thoughtfully-designed products are made in the USA and focus on the rich words of hymns and the beauty of nature. 

Hope you loved this episode!  Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! 🙂

xo,

Alli