Navigating Faith Through Uncertain Times with Sarah Bessey Episode 314

Navigating Faith Through Uncertain Times

Today, we are diving into an important topic that I don’t think gets covered enough: what do you do when you feel like you’re in the wilderness of your faith? Maybe you’ve been through one of those seasons, most of us have, or you’re going through a season of helping someone else who’s feeling this way. Sarah’s wisdom, empathy, and thoughtfulness are going to be a blessing to you as it has been to me.

Sarah Bessey is the author and editor of five books, including the New York Times bestseller A Rhythm of Prayer. She also leads Evolving Faith, a conference and online community for people who are reimagining their faith with hope. 

In her new book, Field Notes for the Wilderness: Practices for an Evolving Faith, Sarah becomes a shepherd for our curiosity, giving us a table for our questions, tools to cultivate what we crave, and a blessing for what was, even as we leave it behind.

Let’s get started. 

Navigating Our Faith

I asked Sarah why is it so scary for people to examine their faith and question what they’ve been taught. And she says she thinks there are a couple of reasons why. 

First, there’s the feeling that you’re losing everything—God, answers, and people. Another aspect is that it’s almost being spoken about as something to be afraid of—during her own experience, Sarah shares that she realized this is a normal part of spiritual formation. But she was told for so long that you cannot have doubts or questions or don’t dare to investigate the scriptures. Lastly, there is a lack of normalization about the idea of an evolving faith. 

Yes, we believe that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever; nevertheless, Sarah shares that she believes her understanding and response to that changes, and it is the deepening of that that is an important part of spiritual formation. 

What It Means to Be in a Season of Reimagining Our Faith

Sarah and I both agreed that we didn’t like the word “deconstruction,” so we decided to go with examining our faith or reimagining it. That can be scary for people; however, there are people who have no idea what that is, so I asked Sarah what it looks like to be in a season of reimagining our faith.

She says there are various ways to approach it. Many people think it happens in their twenties, but she’s seen many go through this in their 40s or even 70s. And she says there are various reasons why; sometimes it’s doubt, questions, or answers, and sometimes it’s the community they are in, whether politically or culturally. So, she says this is where a lot of empathy and permission are good places to start. Sometimes, people are shoving things down until they can’t anymore, and then it just all comes back up. 

But the alternative is being like, “I’m just going to burn it all down; there’s nothing to save here, I don’t want anything to do with this path.” Sarah believes that’s a normal response to and healthy for a little while. The third way that the season of reimagining our faith looks like is having room for questions, doubts, critiques, and the changes that may need to happen. 

Encouragement For Those Reimagining Their Faith

Sarah encourages those who are in the wilderness season of reimagining their faith. She first structured her book as letters because she finds it really important to be able to speak directly to one another. The foundation of the book, which has informed a lot of her work, faith, and journey, is that we cannot wander away from God’s love. 

We can get a few things wrong and still enjoy the friendship and goodness of God. The foundation for everything is how deeply God loves us, and there is no place we can wander away from God’s love; He is kind and patient towards us. We can believe that for everyone else, but it’s hard for us to believe it’s the same for ourselves. 

Coaching This Week: Cultivate Self-Awareness (36:02)

Last week, we discussed how important self-awareness is and what it isn’t. This week, I’m giving you an exercise to help you cultivate it. One of the things that women struggle with is connecting to their true selves. It’s not shocking. We’re always paying attention to what everyone else wants and needs, so we end up neglecting our own wants and needs. I talked about this in Remaining You While Raising Them. We don’t have a lot left to think about anything beyond the next thing we have to do. Don’t let this discourage you, though. There’s a way to start noticing your reactions and letting that information shape how you react in the future.

When you are in a stressful situation, like a kid throwing a tantrum, stop and notice where in your body you feel the stress. What are your wants and needs in that moment? Take time to pause and get curious about why you’re reacting to that situation with tension and frustration. Ask yourself how you’re feeling; pay attention to how you’re feeling and kind of go a level deeper so you’re aware of what’s going on in your body. As you begin to tune into your body signals and ask yourself questions about them, you’ll be able to respond to situations around you with more wisdom and more grace.

What too many women do is not paying attention to ourselves, we’re not paying attention to our reactions, and we’re kind of numbing out and not paying attention at all. What happens over time is that this leads to greater burnout, greater emotional overwhelm, and not necessarily a lot of sadness. 

Exercise For This Week

Over the next few days, when you feel yourself having a strong reaction, like someone cuts you off in traffic or a friend cancels plans again, pay attention to the physical response that you have in that situation. Take time to notice how your body feels. Is your chest heavy? Is your throat tight? Is your stomach flopping back and forth? For me, when I went through a really difficult time in my life, my stomach was upset all of the time. That was kind of my indication that something was wrong. Once you know what you’re feeling in your body, you can take it a step further.

I know this sounds strange, but just go with it. This takes practice, and it’s going to take some time to get better and get used to it, but it’s worth it. Over time, you’ll build a stronger connection to yourself and be better equipped to navigate life’s challenges. Remember, you are worth investing in! Come back next week for part three! 

Listen or Watch now:

iTunes.

Spotify.

YouTube.

Favorite Quotes: 

“You can’t wander away from God’s love. You can get a few things wrong and still enjoy the goodness and friendship of God. This is not a thing that is jeopardy.” 

(18:15 Audio)

 “In the midst of all of that, you can’t outwander God and you can’t run away from the run of God. That is still the thing that is holding everything including the wilderness inside you.”

(20:56 Audio)

“It is not enough to just be against things. I need to begin to name what I am for.”

(21:52 Audio)

“One of the other ones that was really important for me was learning how to love the world again.”

(23:04 Audio)

“God is hiding in plain sight in our every day walking around lives.”

(24:00 Audio)

Links to Great Things We Discussed:

• Sarah Bessey Website
• Sarah Bessey Instagram
• Field Notes for the Wilderness: Practices for an Evolving Faith
• Plowshare Prayer – Spencer LaJoye
• The Tree – Maren Morris
• Sarah’s Playlist 
• Past Lives
• Have a Beautiful, Terrible Day!: Daily Meditations for the Ups, Downs & In-Betweens
• Black Liturgies: Prayers, Poems, and Meditations for Staying Human
• Demon Copperhead
• One Long River of Song
• Charlotte Tilbury Lipstick
• NIRA Pro Laser & Serum Collection 
• Red Light Panel
• Aquaphor
• Create a Course
• Alli on YouTube
• Remaining You While Raising Them

Order your copy of Remaining You While Raising Them here.

Hope you loved this episode!  Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! 🙂

xo,

Alli